Reunion Time - sent June 26, 2009

Reunion time nears, has it been thirty years,
Since we roamed the halls of Newton High?
A party is planned; it'll be really grand;
Come whether you drive, sail or fly!

More than one hundred paid; we’ll be there on that day
To take a stroll down mem’ry lane.
A pro taking shots of us all looking hot,
Will make books to show we all came.

The deadline’s today, at least so we say,
But we want everyone to come.
We’ll wait two more days, so there’s still time to pay,
And no one will miss all the fun.

What will we all wear? Please don’t despair.
We want to be seen at our best.
If I were a guy, I’d wear coat and tie,
But come any way you are dressed.

We’re feeling quite hearty, and ready to party
July 11th’s the date.
It'll be lots of fun; But I just hope that there's some
Way that before then I can lose some weight!
 

Signs That We're Not the Kids We Used to Be

   * You quit trying to hold your stomach in, no matter who walks into the room.
   * You consider coffee one of the most important things in life.
   * Your arms are almost too short to read the newspaper.
   * You talk about "good grass" and you're referring to someone's lawn.
   * You remember when the elevator music was in the Top 10.
   * You know the names of your Congresspersons.
   * You catch yourself saying "When I was your age..."
    * Neighbors borrow your tools.
    * You send money to PBS.
    * The end of your tie doesn't come anywhere near the top of your pants.
    * You answer your kids' questions with, "because I said so!"
    * You know what the word "equity" means.
    * You get into a heated argument about pension plans.
    * You have a party and the neighbors don't even realize it. 

BIG REUNION     Beth Boswell Jacks

One day I got a letter from an old classmate
saying: “Class Reunion! Remember this date.
We’re gonna get together at our dear high school
to dance and talk and act a fool.
Years have passed and we’ll really have fun
seeing what damage all those years have done.
Lose a little weight and dye your hair,
and no excuses. Y’all all be there
at the big reunion."

Now, my mind started working: Were the gals still purty?
Would they flirt like crazy and dance a little dirty?
When I come through the door will they all still swoon?
Will I even have a break for the Little Boys’ Room?
Will they tell me, “The years have been good to you,”
and cuddle up close and squeeze me? Oooh!
Big Reunion! Gonna have a little fun.
Big Reunion! And I’m still top gun.

So I lost ten pounds eating Lean Cuisine,
decided to splurge on a limousine,
put a diamond on my finger, bigger than life –
kinda sentimental (from my last ex-wife).
Arrived a minute late so I’d look real chic,
been working on my entrance for, I guess, a solid week.
First woman I saw knocked me on my rear.
My brain said, “Son, I’m so glad you’re here
at the big reunion!"

I moved over closer to this knock-out dame,
and said, “Hey, Sugar, do I know your name?”
That good-looking woman put me in my place
when she looked me in the eye and laughed in my face.
“Where were you back in high school, buddy,
when I didn’t have a figure and my face was kinda muddy?
I never had a boyfriend and I never had a date.
Sorry, big guy, but you’re years too late
at this big reunion."

I learned my lesson, you fellows in school.
Look a little deeper ‘less you wanta be a fool.
There’s some sweet young gals who stay a little hid,
so give ‘em a call – you’ll be glad you did . . .
at the big reunion!